The Fifth Colu.mn: What Stinks?
I sweat a lot. Always have. When I run in the winter, however, I don’t usually start sweating until I go back inside. That probably has something to do with the fact that it is, you know, negative 5 degrees F outside usually. After I come inside, I strip, hang up all my clothes (pretty much sweat-free at this point) and jump in the shower. This way, I can wear my running clothes multiple times before having to wash them. It’s a slick system, really.
Garrett Hoffman is blogging his transition at transformgarret.blogspot.com. Read his other posts here
The other day, for some reason, instead of stripping right inside my door I sat on my couch and started writing (I think I had a rad idea for a chapter of the book I’m writing or something). Anyway, 2 hours later I was still on my couch and still poking away at my Mac keyboard when I noticed something smelled. It smelled really really bad. I, naturally, blamed it on my cat because she is one stinky little bastard sometimes but I noticed that the cat was actually in my bedroom and was certain I could not smell her from that far away. Damn. What was that? Did something die in my apartment? Blech.
After a few minutes of wondering I realized that it was ME. SICK. Oh my god men smell disgusting after working out! Holy crap! You know that when you start smelling yourself, it’s really bad! The only thing that I ever smelled about myself before were my feet. Feet stink, it’s what they do, but this was my entire body. I imagine that if somebody had taken a picture of me at that point you could actually see the stink emanating from my body with those wavy pea green lines like in the cartoons. I think I need to find a more potent antiperspirant. Suggestions?
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